Pre-Pregnancy weight: 195 lbs.
Current Weight at end of pregnancy: 202 lbs.
October 19, 2002 - 5:48 a.m.
nope. not pregnant. Charlie decided to come and save me the $14 I would have spent buying a pg test.
I geuss I would be happy not to be pg. I'm not down to my ideal weight to be pg. My marriage is coming back from the grave. So I KNOW it's not a good time to be bringing a child into this world. Especially if my world is messed up. Although, I am still a bit sad. An odd thought had made a run through my mind earlier this week. I never had any of these self-pity-I-need-a-man-to-be-happy-I-can't-do-anything-without-him-poor-pitiful-me thoughts before. And it came to me as a surprise. But now it's gone, well, not really, it's lurking in the back brain somewhere in the unconcsious.
I digress.
I really wanted to write about S's brother, I'll call him P. P, has this girlfriend. And he has fallen head over heals for her. I am so happy for him. His parents, on the other hand, don't seem to be too happy. I'm so joyous about P finally finding someone that will love him back for all that he is that I can't fathom anyone not liking it.
On a final thought before I go start my day. Have I told you, dearest diary, that my husband puts joy in my heart? That he really makes my day sometimes. Often times, he makes my week. Today, he and I are going to museums together. And him just telling me that he wanted to go, has got me on cloud 9.
I think I'm starting to fall in love with him again. It's like I'm not sure how it's going to end, but I hope it doesn't.
