January 01, 2004 - 11:50 p.m.

Things are finally coming to a calm. :) And things are starting to be more on a routine. Which is nice. I'm tired though. I geuss that comes with the territory of being a mom. I'm just tired of feeling so tired. Know what I mean?

I feel like I'm lost in this sea of everything else and not really taking the time to listen and watch. This new year started out well. I've got a husband who loves me, a baby that is wonderful and a body that is practically 30 pounds less then what it was last new years. So what's really bothering me?

Could be a lack of spiritual challenge in my life? I've been a bit lopsided in my spiritual walk since Greenbeans arrival. I really need a spiritual kick in the tushy.

And I also need a motivational kick in the domestication department too. My house has officially turned into a tornado dump center. Well, it isn't quite as bad as that but I still have Christmas presents laying around in there boxes still and clothes that I've been switching out for Greenbean. Oh and we're selling some of it on eBay. Most of it she never even wore. (just goes to show how much clothes she got, LOL)

And my husband wants to move Greenbean into her own room. I'm sad and I'm dreading the move. I really enjoy having her sleep in our room. Although she sleeps in her crib and not in our bed it shouldn't be a big transition for her (since she is only 5 1/2 months old). But for me, I think I'll cry when it's actually done. I'm scared that the monitor won't work that I even had a nightmare last night about it. I woke up in a panic. But I think it'll be at least another week before it happens.

I started working out yesterday. Again. After a 2 week break. Sheesh. I don't know what the deal is. I really want to lose at least 15 pounds by May before I go see my Mom. 10 pounds at the least.

Anyhow. I really need to get going. It's late and I should nurse Greenbean before heading off to bed. :) Good night.

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