July 06, 2004 - 3:19 p.m.

I'm screwed. Totally screwed. I finally switched OB's because we really disliked the hospital we had Greenbean in. I had my first appt. with the new doctor (my 2nd actual appt with this pregnancy). Everything was going great, she's a really nice doctor. But the only problem is this: she won't do a VBAC. Well, that's not true. The practice she's with won't do them. So I almost wasted 3 hours of my day. The only good thing to come out of the whole appt was that I got my preliminary blood work done and I made an appt with the high risk doc down the hall to have my cerclage put in. So, back home I came with the most crankiest baby you have ever heard wishing I was near a military base so I could at least see a different doctor without having to do a bunch of hoop jumping.

I sit here now with no doctor who will do a VBAC and no midwife either because TEXAS just passed a law saying Midwives and most OB/GYN practices can NOT perform VBAC's due to malpractice insurance. Damn those sue happy people! Didn't they KNOW the risks going into it? So what the hell am I going to do now?!?!?!!!!!!! I do NOT want another c-section. I had such a hard time recovering from the one with Greenbean that I can't bear to do it again. It took me a good 4 weeks before I even STARTED feeling normal. I'd be okay with a c-section if I already went into labor and I REALLY needed it. Maybe I can ask my OB if she'd let me go into labor naturally and then do it. I don't know. I'll have to talk to my husband. I'm so upset right now I'm seeing red. Update on this, my original OB will work with me on a VBAC. Maybe I should return to her and suck it up with the hospital? Help here!

On a good note, I only gained 2 pounds. So that makes my weight 177. So that's good.

Okay. I'm off to wash my face and blow my nose. Maybe drink a root beer.

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